Friday, August 18, 2006

Five Things I’m Hoping for This Fall

1. School: I hope that all my kids will find their muses and personal magic and do well in school this Fall without too much Momming from me. I hope there will be no bullying, lots of personal growth, lots of confidence building, and that they find their academic voices without too much trouble. I hope they will have fun doing so.

2. Marriage: I hope things keep becoming more positive so that I can mentally and emotionally move away from my somewhat self-protective stance. I hope I can learn to take some things, not for granted, but as standard givens again.

3. Finance: I hope things continue to go well with my husband’s work and that I can find a part-time job. He has a good secretary now, who seems eager to learn and interested in keeping her job (which is a real change for him). I’m having a booger of a time finding part-time work. There are lots of obstacles – this is one of the downfalls of living in a small town, in part, not a lot of jobs that are not either “stand all day” retail, which also involve lots of lifting (not things I can do with my hinky back), or “be my mini-me” office jobs with lots of down time in small two-people offices. I wouldn’t mind the latter if I were able to keep productively busy all the time. Down time is depressing. And, then, there’s the problem of commuting for part-time, combined with gas prices. At some point, it becomes a hobby more than a job because of the cost of commuting. I’ve checked temp agencies, I check the local workforce board daily, and I keep my eyes on the want ads. I just need to keep looking, I guess. Opening a business of my own is not an option at present due to capital outlay and lifting constraints. Poo!

4. Old People: My Dad’s generator replacement went well, and he seems to be maintaining pretty well cognitively and physically. He’s still feeble and dotty, but no more feeble and not much more dotty than last year at this time. I hope I have him around for quite a while longer to love and continue to learn from. He loves me, too, and I would miss that if he were to pass on.

I hope my mother-in-law can come to grips with her own talents, skills, and limitations. There are some worrisome things there – she can’t retain new information very well – asks the same question over and over, despite having had the answers given to her verbally, in written form, and sometimes graphically (pictures). We’re up to six repetitions on the pension arrangement now, and she still doesn’t remember. She doesn’t remember when she gets important mail and piles it up in a hellbound-for-disaster hodgepodge. Her health is fine, and she’s feisty, both of which are good. Unfortunately, she’s also one of those people who thinks she understands finances better than she actually does, and it is already getting her into a little trouble, which is a looming crash. She also gets… notions. I don’t know if anyone other than Southerners would understand that word the way I mean it. I suppose the best way to say it is that she develops unreasonable prejudices against bizarre or petty things or people, and nothing will shake her from them, not even clear and obvious mountains of evidence to the contrary. “Notions” also include preferences for things that are not good for her but which she believes in wholeheartedly and defends. We all do this, I think, but under a certain age they seem less set in stone. She’s not under that certain age.

Oh, well. It’s not my thing to get het up about, and if bad stuff happens, it’s really only going to affect me indirectly anyway. But I can still hope for good and better things to happen for her.

5. Health: I’m doing pretty well at sticking to my piddly exercise routine, but I have some issues of midlife and menopause that are slowly but surely getting to the point where I need official medical diagnoses, treatments, surgeries, or whatever. Some of it’s embarrassing, some of it’s merely annoying, but I’d like to not have to think about it or have an “official” means of coping or rehabilitating. Which means I need to get off my wide, reluctant tail and start looking for doctors. Another small town factoid – local g.p.s, ob/gyns, and the like are usually booked to the point where they refuse new patients, so this’ll mean adding an out of town trip for every appointment. Like I need another excuse to avoid doing it! (snort).

Dentists, too, although not to the same extent. We also wind up with orthodontists or other specialists who rotate through one or two days a week, which means that if I can get an appointment, it’s likely to be six months from now. Which sucks. Fortunately, I went through the whole tooth drama a few years ago, and now I’m just brushing, flossing and mouth washing to keep the choppers I’ve got. I’m also digressing from the medical thing (did you notice how smoooooothly I did that, though?!) Anyway, I hope I can find some doctors who turn out to be truly reasonable people and who will make my irrational dread evaporate into nothingness.


Hope you have a great weekend – I think we may cash in the cow this weekend and do a family night at the movies. Any suggestions?

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